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Family holidays can still feel secure and enjoyable after a separation when both parents settle the practical details well before departure. Early arrangements reduce misunderstandings and give children clear answers about where they’re going, who they’ll be with and when they’ll return. Keep the plan realistic, record key decisions in writing and leave enough time to deal with passports, bookings and any legal requirements.
Agree on the Itinerary Early
Start discussing school holiday dates before flights or accommodation are booked. A clear itinerary should cover departure and return times, transport, accommodation details, emergency contacts and any handover arrangements. Taking time to create a well-planned travel itinerary can help both parents work from the same schedule and reduce last-minute confusion. Add the information to a shared parenting calendar so both households can refer to the same version.
Build in some flexibility for delays, illness or cancelled transport. For example, if one parent is collecting the children at 10 am after an evening flight, agree in advance what happens if the flight lands late. Keeping family communication open during difficult times can make these changes easier to manage without involving the children in adult disagreements. Children should also know the broad plan, though provisional details don’t need to be shared with them.
Managing Travel Costs Fairly
Discuss costs before anyone pays a deposit. Holiday expenses may include tickets, luggage, insurance, passport renewals, airport transfers and spending money, so agreeing only to split the headline booking price can leave gaps later.
There’s no single arrangement that suits every family. Some parents divide agreed costs equally, while others contribute in line with their incomes or pay separately for holidays taken during their own parenting time. Keep receipts and confirm unusual expenses in writing. If financial responsibilities or parenting time remain disputed during a divorce, a family law professional in the relevant area can explain how existing agreements or court orders may affect the plan. Avoid asking children to carry payment messages between households.
Handling Legal Travel Permissions
Check the legal requirements before booking international travel, particularly if the child will leave the country with only one parent. Depending on the family’s circumstances and the places involved, you may need written consent, identity documents or a copy of a court order. Official travel document requirements for children can help you identify what paperwork may be needed before departure.
A consent letter commonly includes the child’s details, travel dates, destination, accommodation and the non-travelling parent’s contact information. Some destinations or transport providers may request particular wording or supporting documents. Check with the relevant embassy, border authority and airline, then allow time for signatures or certification. If consent is refused or an order limits travel, seek legal advice before paying non-refundable costs.
Keep Communication Child-Focused
Use brief, practical messages that deal with one issue at a time. A note such as, “I’d like to take Sam to Spain from 8 to 15 August, and I’ll send the flight and hotel details by Friday,” gives the other parent something specific to consider. Emotional history, blame and unrelated disputes make a simple request harder to resolve.
Agree how the children will stay in touch during the trip. A short call every other evening may work better than frequent messages that interrupt activities, especially for younger children. Tell the travelling parent about medicines, allergies, routines and current worries too. On return, give children space to talk about their holiday without questioning them about the other household or treating their answers as a report.
Once the dates are settled, send one final written itinerary containing the confirmed details and keep a copy with the travel documents. That single reference point can prevent last-minute confusion at the airport, the handover or the journey home.
Note: This is a collaborative post
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